Conspiracy Theory #56- Why are we at war all the time?

I know not with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones.
Albert Einstein (1879 - 1955)

Being a Child of the eighties I have only witnessed 4 “wars” in my lifetime. I only remember 3. I can still remember coming home from school on January 12, 1991. I was nine years old at the time. I remember sitting in the living room and my mom very intently watching President George Bush on TV as he declared a military engagement authorized by congress on the nation of Iraq. She started to cry and I knew something very serious was happening. I had a paper route at the time and can remember rolling newspapers on the ground as I watched tons of missiles lighting up Iraq at night. It was quite a scene, like out of the movies. Very surreal. This was the beginning of the Persian Gulf War.

At the age of nine, I would simply describe the Persian Gulf War as “war”. What a silly little boy. No, No, this was a military engagement authorized by congress, which is different from a formal declaration of war, which is different from military engagement of presidential authorization. There have only been 5 formal declarations of war (War of 1812, Mexican-American War, Spanish-American War, WWI, and WWII), 12 military engagements authorized by congress, and well over 125 (it is really a much higher number, but most of it was unofficial) Presidential military actions in the history of the U.S. Interestingly enough, the Civil War doesn’t fall under any of those categories.

So in the 233 years of the United States of America, how many years have we not been involved in some kind of military action? Zero. The “Land of the Free and the Home of the Brave” has never had so much as one day of zero military actions. It is estimated that the U.S. has killed 8 million people in the course of 233 years. That is nothing compared to written history of the world. Since 2925 B.C. there has been an unbroken period of hostility between one group of people and another group. That means, so far as recorded history goes, there has been 4934 years of continuous war…..and counting. Nice!

I am extremely grateful for the men and women who have sacrificed their lives so I may enjoy the freedoms, fortunate lifestyle, opportunities, and relative peace of today. I wish that statement applied to every military action the U.S. has ever been involved with; however, I think everyone can agree that some military actions have not been quite as “noble” as other military actions. I am not about to begin to evaluate every military action ever undertaken, so much as ask the question, “why are we at war all the time?” Do we really need to be involved in some military action all the time? Must people be killed at our military hands’ all the time? On one hand you would think that we should be able to sustain true peace and on the other hand you might think that it requires constant military action to maintain the level of peace we have right now. I think the truth is somewhere in between.

Each hand represents an opinion regarding war. That is the meaning of this statue.

So here is the dirty conspiracy: Have you ever thought that our economy might be dependent upon wars occurring? Have you ever thought we need wars as a reason to redistribute money? I graduated college with a degree in mechanical engineering. From my graduating group, I am the only person I know that took a job in a private industry outside of the government. Now, I include all those department of defense (DOD)contractors like Lockheed Martin, Raytheon, etc. as being government jobs because that is really who their paycheck comes from. I take that back, I know of one other guy who got a job in the private world and then lost it. So how much of a chance do I have at getting a job outside of government funding? Not very likely at all. Tons of engineers and scientists of all fields are getting their paycheck from the Gov. That is a lot of money. Our normal budget for “Defense” is not enough to cover all of that…..so we need some extra cash. What is a great way to request a lot of money and keep it somewhat off the books? War. If we were no longer at war, the government would be required to eliminate most department of defense contracts. The streets would be filled with unemployed scientists and DOD support staff. The last thing you want to do is give the smart people who were designing those bombs and missiles a pink slip and send them on their way with no hope for future employment. A smart person with a grudge and idle time is a lethal combination. Then there is the military dependent people themselves (Army, Air Force, Navy, Marines, etc.). Do you really want to hand out pink slips to people that have been trained to kill you?

Since the forties, the U.S. has needed a body of scientific intelligence for defense oriented tasks in addition to typical military groups. Like all government programs, this body of scientific intelligence just got more inflated and expanded to the point that you can’t start minimizing it without serious repercussions. Our great nation’s simple fix for this epidemic is that we must be involved in some sort of military action all the time. Congressional appropriations have to come up with this extra cash to fund all this stuff. Where is that money coming from? Heck if I know?!!!

War costs in Iraq have increased sharply every year—from $50 billion in 2003 to $135 billion in 2007. Costs are projected to keep rising. Interesting phenomena…. The war in Iraq has already cost over $900 billion as of today.

In October 2007, the non-partisan Congressional Budget Office estimated that additional war costs over the next 10 years would range between $570 billion and $1.1 trillion, depending on troop levels, with overall costs for the wars in Iraq, Afghanistan and the “global war on terror” reaching $1.2 trillion to $1.7 trillion by 2017. If all that money translated to paying soldiers $50,000 we would be able to fund 34 MILLION soldiers for one year. For some reason I never heard a number even close to that? If all that money isn't going to pay soldiers, then where is it going?

Funny thing is, I am willing to bet most of that money will never even leave our soil. That money is staying right here no matter where the war is. Redistribution of money. Those tanks and guns being used in these wars were not made in china. In fact, DOD stuff is the only thing America really does make significant amounts of. Whatever we don’t use we sell at bargain prices to the next regime we will fight 25 years from now. Who gave Saddam Hussein those guns and missiles? oh that’s right….the U.S.!!! Given the past history of U.S. military actions and the current dependency upon redistributed DOD money you might as well get comfortable with the idea of war. It is not going away anytime soon. Just wait for the moment that we get our hands dirty with Africa’s problems. That place can keep you busy forever.

However, I still want to know where congress is coming up with this extra money to fund these wars! There must be some U.S. currency printing presses that are overheating with usage.
Vietnam, Iraq I and II, Afghanistan, etc. Sure Muslim extremists are scary, but we have a higher purpose for these military engagements – your way of life and your job.

I can picture in my mind a world without war, a world without hate. And I can picture us attacking that world, because they'd never expect it.
Jack Handey (1949 - )