I'm gonna get all jihad on you..... right here....right now (Freedom and Marital Rights Part 2)

Don't read this post unless you read the previous post. You won't understand the flow!

Jihad. Many people, myself included, thought that “jihad” was the muslim word for holy war. Tis not so my friends, Jihad actually means "struggle in the way of God" or "to struggle to improve one's self and/or society."

No human action will make a parent pick up a weapon faster than someone who is willingly hurting their child. If the parent himself is repeatedly hurt, that parent will inevitably pick up a weapon to defend himself. Some blokes are faster than others at defending after taking a few good punches to the head. The point is, nothing will start a war faster than when one group of people inflicts physical harm on another group. Physical harm can occur as a result of mental or physical abuse, changes in quantities of food, changes in shelter, and don’t forget the all important changes in WEALTH. Since most world history, regarding war, is rather boring, I would like to provide the cliffs notes version of why most wars occur:

Group A attempts to take Item 1 through ∞ from Group B. Group B resists. Conflict ensues.

Geez I should go get a history degree, I should ace almost every test. Ah but the key word-“ almost.”

I wrote about how gay marriage will be the key topic which “will inevitably become the most heated and intense political debate of my lifetime.” I even went as far as to say a political upheaval may be the final result. Crazy Talk!! How can a couple of people wanting to use their wedding tackle in unconventional ways cause a meltdown of our society? Read on…..
Once it has become a constitutional amendment to uphold gay marriage something very interesting will occur within various churches. Some churches may say, “sure we will perform gay marriage ceremonies, no problem.” Some may say, “well if this is what the people want, I guess we will do it.” And finally some churches will say, “This is the one thing I won’t take up the butt. No way will I perform gay marriages.” Don’t churches have the right to make that choice? Sure they do, but according to the constitution with the new gay marriage amendment, not without some repercussions. Repercussions…. you ask?

Let’s say I am the minister of “The 14th Day Orthodox Synagogue of B.S.” church. Let’s say one day a gay couple steps up from my faithful fold of followers and says, “we want to be married.” Let’s say I refuse to perform it because the 17th chapter, 69th verse from the book of Jehosphat says, “thou shalt not sustain gay marriage.” As a representative of a non-profit religious institution I just discriminated against a gay couple based on nothing more than they are gay. That is unconstitutional. Fines may be incurred. But I will be guaranteed to be stripped of my “non-profit religious institution” status. This may not occur at the first instance of refusal, but eventually the almighty Supreme Court shall once again decide this is an act of discrimination. No more tax free, non-profit church status for me. All those tithes and offerings and money I am stealing under the table are now taxable. Two words for what will happen next……..

HOLY WAR – The kind of war that needs no form of logic to occur. Go to Wikipedia and look up Holy War or religious war. You will soon learn that this form of war has transcended every form of religion on every continent. I was informed by my good buddy Vman that, “it has been my observation that the decline of most recorded civilizations were due to power struggles over control of resources. When quality of life is degraded for a group, war soon follows.” You are absolutely right except Holy War needs no resources, no money, no food, no water, no shelter to explode in your face. All it needs is a disagreement and BLAM….. the middle east!

Gay marriage will cause the first true Holy War of the United States of America. Religious extremists will be pitted against homo-lovers. Soon thereafter, conservative religions as a whole will be attacked as a closed-minded, unproductive, violence incurring, and discriminatory fascists. Once religion as a whole is attacked, quite literally, all hell will break loose. Because let’s be honest, 92.3% of homosexual opposition is because of a religious perspective. The remaining 7.7% just think it is gross. This is who will control the ranks of this war-religious zealots vs. anti-religious zealots.

Did you know that the Muslims and Jews fought together against the Christians during the Crusades? I can’t think of a religious group that hates each other more than the Jews and the Muslims. Holy War causes strange things to happen, all in the name of God. So which side of the “struggle in the way of God” will you be on? Jihadians unite!

Man as I proofread this, I can’t help but think this sounds mighty apocalyptic. Once again this is my own personal foolish fortune telling and in no way represents anything I have ever heard from any other source. I am no prophet….right comrades??!!lol